The joys of parenthood and how it has changed me as a person.

On March 14, 2008 I had the great privilege of becoming a father to a beautiful baby girl.  It was the most amazing day of my life as I watched her come into this world.  I was frozen in the moment and couldn’t even react, it was like wow we made that!  I think that is the day that I actually became a MAN, when it was no longer about me but about a life that I helped to bring into this world.  It is now my job to shelter her from the evils of this world but at the same time show her enough so that she is not oblivious to it.  It is now my job to teach her how to love, care and respect everyone in this world,  just like my parents taught me.

Being a dad has totally changed my outlook and views on life.  Back then it was always about me, me, me.  When is the next great video game coming out, when are we going to here or there, lets do this and that.   Now it’s all about her first, everything that I do I always think about her first.  Every little thing I do, it’s with her in mind.  Now don’t get me wrong I still play video games and do fun stuff with my wife, but before I go buy a new video game now I make sure she has everything that she needs before I go and get myself a recreational item.  It’s not even about the money things either all the time, I will not bring my daughter into an environment that is not good for her.  I don’t care if other parents are bringing their children there, if it is not a healthy environment for my daughter then sorry “I can’t make it” is what I say.

I am not judging other parents that bring their children or do other stuff with them.  This is just the way I choose to raise my daughter, there are way too many crazy things and people in this world for me to take any chances.  So in ending I have learned from being a parent that it’s not all about me, there is someone else that depends on me for their safety and well being.  I am perfectly fine and happy with this, I would not have it any other way.

MY PRINCESS / WHAT I LIVE FOR

Letter to 16 year old me.

Dear 16 year old Gamy,

I am writing to you almost 16 years later from my/our apartment still in Southbridge, where I/We live with my/our beautiful wife and daughter. I know you are probably sitting in your room with all your FAB FIVE posters and I don’t want to take up much of your time. But with this letter I hope to let you see the crazy but wonderful road that lies ahead of you.  Over the next 16 years your going to go on one hell of a ride, I wont say its been easy but I can say from where my/our life is right now I wouldn’t change anything.  All I can do is try to give you advice and hope you do whats best for you/me.  So here we go with some tips/advice, I suppose I will start on the lighter side of things.

• Video games are still around and Madden will become the most popular sports game ever.  You will not believe that the games you are playing now will look like trash compared to what is out now in 2010.  But you will also miss the days when they weren’t so complicated.
• Pierce your ears when you get the chance don’t be afraid that you will be categorized as a thug/bad person for doing so.
• It’s ok to listen to country music, and other types of music.  You can’t listen to tupac forever haha.
• Stay close with your best friends and keep those relationship going after high school, if you forget about them because you “found” a girlfriend, it will be hard to get back those times and you sure will miss them.

Ok, I think it’s time for the serious stuff.

• Stay who you are and don’t change for anyone or anything.
• Pay attention in school and enjoy these last couple of years of high school.  I know it sounds cliche’  but you’re really going to miss “the good old days”  when nothing mattered.
• I know you quit playing football when freshman season ended but you need to get back on the team, your going to regret it if you don’t.
• Don’t let all your friendships fade away.  Stop being so shy and have some fun with your friends.
• When your a senior, take it seriously and don’t wait until the last minute to start applying to schools.

Let’s move on to the real serious stuff, I guess I can tell you a little bit of your future without ruining all the fun.  7 months after you graduate from high school you will get married, not because you really want to but more because you feel forced to.  I can tell you now not to do it, but if you don’t then I/we wouldn’t be who I/we am/are today.  Just so you know its not going to work out, so if you can keep the relationship going with out actually getting married then our future won’t be too much different.

Next after this you will feel the biggest heartbreak you have ever felt.  This was caused by lies and deceit by people around you and the person that goes thru this with you.  Your going to feel like your life is over and you don’t really want to go on, but don’t worry almost a year later your going to meet the woman who your going to marry and be the mother of your children.  So it will all be worth it in the end, You will be very, very happy with who you end up with.  She is everything you ever wanted in a woman.

As you can see it looks like your/our live gets very complicated at times but at the same time I have no regrets.  All I can tell you is be who you are, always trust your gut instinct, love your family and friends they are all you have.

Ok I guess thats about all I have to say but before I end this let me give you a glimpse into stuff that will happen or you should do.

• That internet thing that your just learning now, will be the biggest and one of the most important things of the future.  You may want to write this down, when you hear of a company called “google” or maybe even “facebook” buy all the stock that you can possibly afford.  You will not regret it.
• Your going to be a blackberry addict, it’s not a bad thing.  You will meet some great people around the country just from this “addiction”.
• You have some great friends now that you didn’t have back then, I guess thats the way life is.  But please try your best to keep your current friendships going.
• Never ever ever drink alcohol on an empty stomach or mix drinks… I’ll just leave that one at that.
• The 2000′s will be the greatest decade ever in New England Sports… If you can before the 2004 baseball season starts, put all the money you can get on the Boston Red Sox.  You will not be disappointed.
• Last but not least Love God above all things then your family…. (I probably should of put this first)

Sincerly yours

31 year old Gamy

PS…… Isn’t she beautiful?

Dear Lebron

First off let me start off by saying no I don’t hate you or your decision to go play with the Miami Heat.  The only thing that bothers me is the way you went about it.  You were loyal to Cleveland while you played there and the fans there were loyal to you, I just think they deserved a little more respect than you gave them by leaving the way you did with “The Decision” .   With “The Decision”, you made it all about Lebron.  What happened to the Lebron we knew here?

I’m sure if you would of  just called Cleveland and said sorry but I’m not coming back then the backlash wouldn’t be as big as it was and still is.  By taking it on National TV you gave them hope that really wasn’t there, you made it seem as if they really had a chance at keeping you there to cheer for you.  You say you did it to raise money for the boys and girls club, but again why did you do it in one of the richest cities around and not an inner city or an area with more need?

Once again I’d like to say I don’t hate you (Unless your playing the Celtics).  You are arguably one of the top 2 players in the league along with Kobe.  There is no denying that, but as a fan of the NBA I feel that if you made it a little less about you and more about basketball then you won’t have to worry about your “reputation”.  Free agency is part of the business side of the NBA, Michael, Larry and Charles probably can not relate to the decision you had to make because they played with other great players for the most part.  Charles can’t say anything since he is the one that tried to win the ring with Hakeem and Clyde.  I think the old timers were just more upset about how you went about things rather than you going to play with the Heat.

As a fan I just ask that you move on from all this hate and negativity and make it about basketball again and not about Lebron.  Just play ball, you have a great chance to win multiple titles (again not this year, because Boston will win it)  for the next 5 years.  Leave your legacy on the basketball court not in the media.

Thanks for reading.

 

 

Gamy

Friends don’t charge friends!!

Just wanted to say when your a friend you do things for your friends out of the kindness of you heart.  When you do stuff and expect to be reimbursed that makes it business.  Making a friendship into a business can only lead into trouble.  ”I’ll pay you next week” turns into “He/She owes me money, they used to be my best friend 3 years ago but we haven’t spoken since.”  So is it really worth it to charge your “friend” $25 to change his brakes and risk losing that friendship if he can’t pay you?  When that same friend has helped you in the past to move into a new apartment, given you a ride somewhere, etc.?  It all evens out at the end.  It all comes down to “do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”

So be a friend to a friend, don’t be a business man to a friend!  It’s not worth it to lose a friendship over a couple of bucks.

 

P.S.  Obviously this can not be true for every situation.  I am just speaking of small things that are really not worth losing friendships over.

My lil rant

Previously I attempted to start a “blog”, but failed to even get that going.  This will be my second attempt at it.  I always find it very interesting to read random blogs on here, I guess I just read them to see what random people in the world are thinking about or going through.  It’s amazing to read the thoughts of “strangers” across the country or even across the word and see that we are going through the same things.  It doesn’t matter what race the person is, what religion or god they follow, they all have the same joys and fears in life.

I’m still shocked at all the hate in this world.  People are hated on because of the color of their skin, gender, religion or even what political party they follow.  I’ve thought of why people hate on each other so much.  I’ve thought of the obvious reasons like growing up watching too much tv, playing too many violent video games etc.  But I think the main reason is bad parenting.  (just my personal opinion).

Let me just say that not all bad people had bad parents.  Some obviously got corrupted on their own or from other outside influences.  However if you raise a child with love and not shelter them from everything then maybe just maybe this world could be a better place. Show your kids a little discipline.  I don’t get why people blame religions or extremists for all this hate.  I seriously have never seen a religion that preaches violence/hate.

On the contrary most religions preach about loving one another above anything else. It talks about sewing either financially or thru your gifts. Pretty much just help each other out whenever you can.

Well enough of my lil rant, feel free to comment.